Dearest Zarena,
It's been so long since we spoke via "Khor Jaan" and this was an amazing letter. I really enjoyed every bit of it and was glued to every word of it. Thank you for these wonderful tips but even before I begin, thanks for sharing you and your family's picture. Wow you guys look so stunning - its an absolutely gorgeous photograph. Can I add you are getting more and more beautiful by the day :)
You are very right in those values. I hope I can take good care of all of those values when the time comes. I was having this discussion the other day with a friend, Anke, who used to be with us in Mills College if you remember. She is studying in SOAS now where I did my Masters. Your mentioning "respect" made me think about this because at the time it just really moved us the discussion.
I remember it came up in the context of all the talk about women harrassment in Egypt during riots and how there is an app called "Harassmap" to report this whenever you come across any sort of harrassment on the streets of Egypt. Think this app was created after protests leading to the revolution started across the country and there were reports of women facing insecurity. I am not going into the debate of whether these are exaggerated fears or not, but a single woman unsafe any where at any point should be a concern to all who could have saved her or protected her in any way. At least that's what our faith teaches us too as well as any human morals.
This brought Anke and me to the topic of the mentality where women can be jeered at, looked down upon if they bo beyond certain social "boundaries" or simply used for pleasure and put aside. There are so many boys out there whose parents know they are only having fun but when its time to get married, they will choose a perfect, "innocent" girl - the "marriage" type. I know it really affected me when Anke was telling me about someone she knew in Jordan and said its shocking that a faith that gives so much emphasis on women's protection and respect, has followers that don't really regard it well enough.
We boiled it down to the importance of "mothers" teaching their sons from childhood about "empathy" which is I think what you mean when you say "respect." To me empathy is, when someone can feel the pain that someone else is feeling when going through it. I really wish I can instill this in my children and especially in my sons if I have any. Culturally we teach our daughters a lot about respect, honor, privacy and seeing that their brothers understand that it is important to protect your sister which is great but what about other sisters. Sisters in your neighborhood, in your community, your country, and humanity in general.
It is this "empathy" which will make them strong enough to avoid a wrong step, strong enough to take the right step, strong enough to make the right decisions. What do you think?
You are very right in those values. I hope I can take good care of all of those values when the time comes. I was having this discussion the other day with a friend, Anke, who used to be with us in Mills College if you remember. She is studying in SOAS now where I did my Masters. Your mentioning "respect" made me think about this because at the time it just really moved us the discussion.
I remember it came up in the context of all the talk about women harrassment in Egypt during riots and how there is an app called "Harassmap" to report this whenever you come across any sort of harrassment on the streets of Egypt. Think this app was created after protests leading to the revolution started across the country and there were reports of women facing insecurity. I am not going into the debate of whether these are exaggerated fears or not, but a single woman unsafe any where at any point should be a concern to all who could have saved her or protected her in any way. At least that's what our faith teaches us too as well as any human morals.
This brought Anke and me to the topic of the mentality where women can be jeered at, looked down upon if they bo beyond certain social "boundaries" or simply used for pleasure and put aside. There are so many boys out there whose parents know they are only having fun but when its time to get married, they will choose a perfect, "innocent" girl - the "marriage" type. I know it really affected me when Anke was telling me about someone she knew in Jordan and said its shocking that a faith that gives so much emphasis on women's protection and respect, has followers that don't really regard it well enough.
We boiled it down to the importance of "mothers" teaching their sons from childhood about "empathy" which is I think what you mean when you say "respect." To me empathy is, when someone can feel the pain that someone else is feeling when going through it. I really wish I can instill this in my children and especially in my sons if I have any. Culturally we teach our daughters a lot about respect, honor, privacy and seeing that their brothers understand that it is important to protect your sister which is great but what about other sisters. Sisters in your neighborhood, in your community, your country, and humanity in general.
It is this "empathy" which will make them strong enough to avoid a wrong step, strong enough to take the right step, strong enough to make the right decisions. What do you think?
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